This is a ban on smoking in public places essay. It is an example of an essay where you have to give your opinion as to whether you agree or disagree.
The sample answer shows you how you can present the opposing argument first, which is not your opinion, and then present your opinion in the following paragraph.
It is always a good idea to present a balanced essay that presents both sides of the argument, but you must always make it very clear what your opinion is and which side of the argument you support.
Ban Smoking in Public Places Essay
| You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write about the following topic: Smoking not only harms the smoker, but also those who are nearby. Therefore, smoking should be banned in public places. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge. Write at least 250 words. |
Model Answer:
Medical studies have shown that smoking not only leads to health problems for the smoker but also for people close by. As a result of this, many believe that smoking should not be allowed in public places. Although there are arguments on both sides, I strongly agree that a ban is the most appropriate course of action.
Opponents of such a ban argue against it for several reasons. Firstly, they say that passive smokers make the choice to breathe in other people’s smoke by going to places where it is allowed. If they would prefer not to smoke passively, then they do not need to visit places where smoking is permitted. In addition, they believe a ban would possibly drive many bars and pubs out of business as smokers would not go there anymore. They also argue it is a matter of freedom of choice. Smoking is not against the law, so individuals should have the freedom to smoke where they wish.
However, there are more convincing arguments in favor of a ban. First and foremost, it has been proven that tobacco consists of carcinogenic compounds that cause serious harm to a person’s health, not only to the smoker. Anyone around them can develop cancers of the lungs, mouth and throat, and other sites in the body. It is simply not fair to impose this upon another person. It is also the case that people’s health is more important than businesses. In any case, pubs and restaurants could adapt to a ban by, for example, allowing smoking areas.
In conclusion, it is clear that it should be made illegal to smoke in public places. This would improve the health of thousands of people, and that is most definitely a positive development.
(290 words)
IELTS Score Evaluation for the Given Essay
1. Task Achievement: Band 7.5 – 8.0
✅ Strengths:
- The essay fully addresses the question and presents a clear stance (strongly agrees with banning smoking in public places).
- Both perspectives are considered, making the argument well-balanced.
- Ideas are well-developed with logical reasoning and supporting details (e.g., health risks, passive smoking, economic concerns).
🔻 Areas for Improvement:
- The essay could include specific real-world examples or statistics to make arguments more compelling (e.g., mentioning a country where a smoking ban has led to health improvements).
- The conclusion is a bit abrupt—it would be stronger if it summarized key reasons instead of just stating the benefits.
Suggested Improvement:
- Provide specific examples (e.g., countries where smoking bans have reduced health issues).
- Strengthen the conclusion by briefly summarizing the main arguments before the final statement.
2. Coherence and Cohesion: Band 8.0
✅ Strengths:
- The essay follows a logical structure: introduction → counterarguments → arguments in favor → conclusion.
- There is good use of linking phrases, such as “firstly,” “however,” “first and foremost,” and “in any case.”
🔻 Areas for Improvement:
- Some transitions could be smoother. For example, instead of “However, there are more convincing arguments in favor of a ban,” a more fluid transition could be:
- “Despite these concerns, the arguments supporting a ban carry greater weight.”
Suggested Improvement:
- Refine transitions for better flow and cohesion between paragraphs.
3. Lexical Resource: Band 7.5 – 8.0
✅ Strengths:
- The vocabulary is varied and appropriate, with strong academic words like “carcinogenic compounds,” “passive smoking,” and “freedom of choice.”
- Good use of synonyms avoids repetition (“not only harms the smoker but also those nearby,” “people’s health is more important than businesses”).
🔻 Areas for Improvement:
- Some phrases could be more precise or sophisticated:
- “It is simply not fair to impose this upon another person.”
→ “Subjecting non-smokers to involuntary exposure is an infringement on their right to a healthy environment.” (More formal and impactful)
- “It is simply not fair to impose this upon another person.”
- A few phrases sound slightly informal (e.g., “smoking is not against the law, so individuals should have the freedom to smoke where they wish.”).
Suggested Improvement:
- Use more academic phrasing and precise word choices where possible.
4. Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 7.5 – 8.0
✅ Strengths:
- Wide range of sentence structures (e.g., complex and compound sentences are well used).
- Mostly error-free grammar; no major mistakes that impact meaning.
🔻 Areas for Improvement:
- Some sentences could be more concise:
- “They also argue it is a matter of freedom of choice.”
→ “They argue it concerns personal freedom.” (More concise and academic)
- “They also argue it is a matter of freedom of choice.”
- Passive voice could be used more effectively in some parts to sound more formal.
Suggested Improvement:
- Refine sentence structures for conciseness.
- Use passive voice strategically where needed for a more academic tone.
Overall IELTS Band Score Estimate: 7.5 – 8.0
| Criterion | Score |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement | 7.5 – 8.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 8.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 7.5 – 8.0 |
| Grammatical Range & Accuracy | 7.5 – 8.0 |
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